The different types of minds and their negativity III.

Here’s a brief description of the types of minds and the negativity each type is usually prone to. Joy-oriented mind– Such minds have a capacity for exuberance, excitement, passionate outlook and a child-like playfulness (which is not the same as holding on a child-identity). These minds are more oriented towards work that feels playful and creative, rather than work that requires a high level of organization, meticulousness and structure. They like working in relaxed environments rather than pressure oriented ones. When you subject a joy oriented mind to a monotonous or aggressive work-situation, it can feel burnt out and irritated. The various negativities that a joy oriented mind can be prone to (based on its outlook and conditioning) are – Greed, suppression, neediness, jealousy, meekness and arrogance. Love oriented mind– The eternal romantic, this type of mind is mostly poetic in its outlook to life. A love oriented mind has a deep capacity for being caring and affectionate. It has a desire for constant romance in all aspects of its life be it career or relationship – not suited for aggressive or pressure-oriented jobs. The various negativities that such mind can be prone to are – neediness, over-sensitivity, meekness, jealousy, unworthiness, suppression and self-pity. Hate oriented mind– These types of minds are mostly serious, have a low sense of humor, tough, exuding an aura of aggressiveness. Such minds lack the aspect of sensitivity, to a large extent, which gives it the capacity to be brutally competent and goal driven. They easily fit into work that requires aggressiveness, leadership and ability to handle pressure. The various negativities that can creep into such a mind are – arrogance, exploitation, greed, jealousy and cynicism. Fear oriented mind– People with this type of mind are highly sincere, loyal, committed and serious. They mostly lack a good sense of humor and most of them are highly organized as a bid to keep their life as structured as possible. They are suited for jobs that require meticulousness, and even monotonous jobs (which suits their serious mindset). The various negativities that can be present in a fear oriented mind are – neediness, meekness, jealousy, unworthiness, self-pity and suppression. Boredom oriented mind– People with this type of mind are mostly laid back, they talk with a drawl and usually come across as being “sleepy”. Some of them actually have a high intellect level and they fit into monotonous jobs as well as strategy based jobs which require a lot of discernment and tact. They exhibit a lot of “alpha” characteristics because they are usually slow in their movements, serious and not easy to impress. The various negativities that they are prone to are – dullness, suppression, cynicism and unworthiness. Sex oriented mind– All minds have a sexual nature, but certain minds are totally dominated by this dimension. You can sense the aura of sexuality in these people is so strong that it just shines like a neon light. They are highly connected with their own body and have a deep capacity for sensual appreciation. They do well in jobs that require people management (most of them have a strong charisma), leadership and creativity. They also fit into monotonous jobs depending on their intellect level. The various negativities they are prone to are – dullness, greed, suppression, unworthiness, arrogance, cynicism and exploitation. Awareness brings the aspect of wisdom All these types of minds can get imbalanced in their dominant dimension as well as in other dimensions in the absence of awareness (which brings wisdom and balance). The various negativities are just signs of imbalance stemming from a place of disconnection with an inner wisdom and wholeness. In the presence of awareness, you can align with the natural makeup of your mind while also bringing a field of wisdom to its expression. To try to change the natural makeup of your mind is totally futile, because it’s hard-wired, it’s your natural conditioning coming from the intention in which you were born. You need to let go of fighting your natural makeup and move towards aligning with it consciously. What’s required is to release the negativity, because it’s only the negativity that attracts a misaligned reality for you. When you align with the natural makeup of your mind, and release the negativity, you are now in a place to attract a highly congruent reality for yourself.

Different Types of Minds and Their Negativity II.

Greed– The mindset of over-indulgence is also a reflection of inner lack where we try to use some outside experience to compensate for the emptiness we feel within. Greed always has negative repercussions because it stems from the vibration of lack. Exploitation– When we lack a sensitivity towards life, we start perpetrating unnecessary abuse and exploitation towards others. There are some humans who even exploit/abuse as means of entertainment, which is quite boggling to contemplate but it’s still the truth of human consciousness. Meekness– The inability to stand up for oneself, and thus stay in a place of servitude, out of fear, is what meekness is all about. Meekness attracts exploitation in the form of getting bullied, victimized, patronized and cheated. A lot of people misunderstand meekness as humility – true humility is just a state of balance, and it’s free of meekness. Cynicism– The mindset of being cynical (having a critical outlook) is the one which lacks sensitivity and love. Cynical people are always trying to put others down, usually out of their need for a sense of superiority (which is indicative of an inner lack). Unworthiness– The mindset of having self-hatred where you intrinsically feel that you don’t deserve good things in your life. Self-pity– The mindset of wallowing in a sense of “why me” or harboring thoughts like “I am so good but others are so bad to me”. People who wallow in self-pity are prone towards blaming the outside for their miseries and always consider themselves as the victims of life. They sometimes even purposely attract some form of abuse in order to feel more pity for themselves. Arrogance– The mindset of “I am the best around” or “I am kind of a big deal”, the narcissistic behavior. Arrogant people genuinely feel superior about themselves but their lack of sensitivity towards life causes them to stay disconnected with several aspects of well-being. Jealousy– The mindset of comparison where you feel bad about the well-being, or abundance, of others. Dullness– This negativity arises when you develop a feeling of hopelessness towards life where you just become insensitive to its aliveness.

Different Types of Minds and Their Negativity.

Understanding your mind is the prerequisite towards aligning with it. Everything physical has limited dimensions – the “mind” (the brain in your body) is physical and hence has limited dimensions/aspects to it. Anyone who has some awareness can easily see all the aspects of their mind quite clearly, and can also understand/know the aspects of any human mind that they observe. I’ve explained the dimensions present in a mind in this post – the 6 dimensions of a mind. Each human mind has one dimension that’s most dominant in it and the dimension which is most dominant in your mind defines the type of mind you possess. So basically there are 6 types of human minds – joy oriented mind, love oriented mind, hate oriented mind, fear oriented mind, boredom oriented mind and sex oriented mind. With some amount of observation/awareness you can easily find out what type of mind you possess. Another aspect of physicality is “negativity”. There are basically 12 types of negativity - Suppression, Neediness, Over-sensitivity, Greed, Exploitation, Meekness, Cynicism, Unworthiness, Self-pity, Arrogance, Jealousy and Dullness. The presence of any one of these negativities in you is enough to attract a negative reflection in your external reality. You need to take the time to identify the types of negativity that you carry within, and start working on dissolving it, through your awareness of it, to attract a congruent reality. There is a definite co-relation between the type of mind you possess and the type of negativity you are likely be carrying within – each type of mind has capacity for only certain types of negativity, for example a love-oriented mind has no capacity for “arrogance” as a negativity. The benefit of understanding the types of minds, and the types of negativities, is that it helps you easily identify the resistances in you and thus let go of it, allowing for quicker alignment. It’s my understanding that the reason why people have a hard time letting go of their negativity is mostly because they are not able to differentiate between the natural makeup of their mind (the type of their mind) and the negativity that’s present in it – instead of letting go of the negativity most people start trying to change their mind’s natural makeup which is not possible, and hence becomes a futile endeavor, and also leads to a misaligned/confused life. Once you free yourself of a negativity within you, you also free yourself of its reflection in your external reality. The types of negativity As I mentioned before, physical realm is a realm of boundaries and limitations, and hence everything physical is quantifiable. There are basically 12 types of negativity that’s capable of being present in a mind/brain (be it human, animals, birds or any living organism with a brain) and once you understand them you will have a clarity about the negativity in yourself and in other humans. Below is a brief description of each of the negativity Suppression– We, as humans, indulge in the practice of suppression in many ways and sometimes even associate the word “noble” with it. We like to suppress our natural drives, our natural movement, our thoughts and our emotions, in a bid to feel more in “control” of our life. However, suppression of any form is not natural and hence always has a negative repercussion. Once you have a stability in your awareness, you stop trying to suppress the physical aspects in you and allow them to play out in the presence of the wisdom of your awareness. The only reason we ever try to suppress something is out of fear, it’s not “noble” or holy, it’s just fear. Anyone who is free of identification with fear, does not indulge in suppression tactics or techniques – and thus becomes more “natural” in his/her behavior. Neediness– When we feel a sense of lack in us we look to the outside for giving us a sense of “completeness”. If you ever feel that you can’t live without something/someone, you know you’ve become needy. You can be needy for approval, love, physical gratification and entertainment (material or spiritual). Desire is natural, but to be intrinsically needy towards it is a movement of negativity. There is a big difference between neediness and a desire for a certain experience. For example, you can desire the experience of an intimate relationship and that’s totally natural, but when you are needy of a relationship the equation is one of negativity. When there is a lack of inner worth, neediness is inevitable. Over-sensitivity– It’s one thing to be sensitive towards life and another thing to be imbalanced in your sensitivity to the point where it becomes a source of suffering for you. People who are over-sensitive are easy targets for victimization because of their tendency towards the notion of “self sacrifice” (which seems noble but is just an imbalance). People who are over-sensitive are definitely “nice” but can easily become repulsive due to their suffering-orientation.

Three Types of Mind II

The shift from one type of mind to the next is not something that can be easily taught. It is something that evolves to the degree that you are able to minimize your fears and expand your consciousness. We evolve from a socialized mind to a self-authoring mind to the degree we are able to overcome our anxieties and fears, individuate, and feel confident about our own capabilities to survive and thrive—our ability to adapt and master life’s challenges. We evolve from a self-authoring mind to a self-transforming mind to the degree that we can detach from the outcomes we think we need, and live in the expectation that we will get exactly what we need to get to the best outcome. This way of being aligns with a spiritual approach to life: the ability to trust in a beneficent universe; the ability to dissolve your attachment to a specific outcome; and the ability to remain at ease with uncertainty. In the industrial age, organisations mainly wanted employees with socialized minds. They wanted people who were good team players, pulled their weight, were loyal to the company, and could be counted on to follow conscientiously the directions or instructions given to them by their bosses. Today, in the information age, organisations mainly want flexible and knowledgeable employees—people who are able to act responsibly, take initiatives, and work independently. They are looking for people with self-authoring minds. What type of mind are you operating with? If you are managing people who do repetitive tasks that do not require too much initiative—people with socialized minds—you will need to have a self-authoring mind. If you are managing people who are constantly being challenged to innovate and find new solutions—people with self-authoring minds—you will need to have a self-transforming mind. In either case, to build a high performing team, you will need to give all team members the opportunity to express their ideas and opinions about their work. This means that you will need to get past the idea that you have all the right answers and that your job as a leader is just to tell people what to do. You will need to be skilled in personal mastery if you are going to manage at team. You will only be successful as a leader of a team if you are able to support your team members in finding fulfilment. And, you will only be able to do this, if you know and understand what type of minds your team members possess and what fulfilment looks like for them.

Three Types of Mind I

As we grow and develop, our brain/mind changes the way in which it operates. Thanks to the neuroplasticity of the brain, we have the ability to adapt the way we view the world at any time during our lives. In his book, Immunity to Change, Robert Kegan points to two key findings about how we handle complexity from the research in this area. [Neuroplasticity: The natural ability of the brain to form new connections in order to compensate for injury or for changes in one’s environment.] First, the ability of adults to handle complexity generally increases with age, and second there are three developmental plateaus to mental complexity. Robert Kegan calls these plateaus the socialized mind, the self-authoring mind, and the self-transforming mind. Thesocialized mindis a dependent mind. The way a socialized mind responds to a situation or request is strongly influenced by what it believes others are expecting, and how it can meet its survival, relationship, and self-esteem needs. It operates from the lower three levels of personal consciousness. The socialized-mind prefers to be given instructions and told what to do. In this way, it is able to overcome its anxiety about being judged and about being able to meet its deficiency needs. Theself-authoring mindis an independent mind. The way a self-authoring mind responds to a situation or request is by feeding back to others what it needs to further its agenda. It is attempting to further its freedom and independence. The self-authoring mind perceives the world through its belief filters. It hears and sees what it wants to hear or see. What gets through the filters is the information it is looking for to support its plan. It corresponds to the transformation level of consciousness. The self-authoring mind wants to be accountable and take initiatives. It will readily accept challenges. It is the type of mind that is required for managerial or supervisory positions. Theself-transformingmindis an interdependent mind. The way a self-transforming mind responds to a situation or request is by seeking out more information to further its need to find meaning, make a difference, and be of service. It corresponds to the upper three levels of personal consciousness. The self-transforming mind is not a prisoner to its beliefs, agenda or position. It is able to witness itself. It is able to look at its own beliefs and ideas objectively, compare them with others, and integrate the best of what it sees into a more inclusive world view. Although people with self-transforming minds have a perspective on the world, they don’t view the world through it. It is there to guide them, but they are quite willing to compare how it stacks up to other world views and modify it if they find something better. This is a necessary and highly-prized quality for someone who is put in the position of leading others.

UTARATIBU WA KUJIUNGA NA JESHI LA KUJENGA TAIFA VIJANA WA MUJIBU WA SHERIA WANAOMALIZA 6 MEI 2014.

UTARATIBU WA KUJIUNGA NA JESHI LA KUJENGA TAIFA VIJANA WA MUJIBU WA SHERIA WANAOMALIZA 6 MEI 2014. AWAMU YA KWANZA; VIJANA 20,000 WATARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA JKT KUANZIA TAREHE 01 JUNI 2014 NA KUANZA RASMI MAFUNZO YAO TAREHE 08 JUNI 2014 NA KUMALIZA TAREHE 04 SEPTEMBA 2014. ORODHA YAO ITAANZA KUONEKANA KWENYE WEBSITE YA JKT TAREHE 11 MEI 2014 KUANZIA SAA NNE (4) ASUBUHI. AWAMU YA PILI; VIJANA 14450 WATARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA JKT KUANZIA TAREHE 11 SEPTEMBA 2014 NA KUANZA RASMI MAFUNZO TAREHE 18 SEPTEMBA 2014 NA KUMALIZA TAREHE 17 DESEMBA 2014. ORODHA YAO ITAANZA KUONEKANA KWENYE WEBSITE YA JKT TAREHE 11 MEI 2014 KUANZIA SAA KUMI (10) JIONI. KIJANA YEYOTE MWENYE ULEMAVU UNAOONEKANA ARIPOTI KATIKA KAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA RUVU JKT (832 KIKOSI CHA JESHI). VIJANA WOTE WANATAKIWA KUWA NA VYETI VYA KUMALIZA KIDATO CHA SITA ( LEAVING CERTIFICATE). INASISITIZWA VIJANA WARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI WALIOPANGIWA NA SIO KUJA MAKAO MAKUU YA JKT. IMETOLEWA NA MKUU WA JESHI LA KUJENGA TAIFA AWAMU YA KWANZA;VIJANA 20,000 WATARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA JKT KUANZIA TAREHE 01 JUNI 2014 NA KUANZA RASMI MAFUNZO YAO TAREHE 08 JUNI 2014 NA KUMALIZA TAREHE 04 SEPTEMBA 2014. ORODHA YAO ITAANZA KUONEKANA KWENYE WEBSITE YA JKT TAREHE 11 MEI 2014 KUANZIA SAA NNE (4) ASUBUHI. AWAMU YA PILI;VIJANA 14450 WATARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA JKT KUANZIA TAREHE 11 SEPTEMBA 2014 NA KUANZA RASMI MAFUNZO TAREHE 18 SEPTEMBA 2014 NA KUMALIZA TAREHE 17 DESEMBA 2014. ORODHA YAO ITAANZA KUONEKANA KWENYE WEBSITE YA JKT TAREHE 11 MEI 2014 KUANZIA SAA KUMI (10) JIONI. KIJANA YEYOTE MWENYE ULEMAVU UNAOONEKANA ARIPOTI KATIKA KAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA RUVU JKT (832 KIKOSI CHA JESHI). VIJANA WOTE WANATAKIWA KUWA NA VYETI VYA KUMALIZA KIDATO CHA SITA ( LEAVING CERTIFICATE). INASISITIZWA VIJANA WARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI WALIOPANGIWA NA SIO KUJA MAKAO MAKUU YA JKT. IMETOLEWA NA MKUU WA JESHI LA KUJENGA TAIFA

UTARATIBU WA KUJIUNGA NA JESHI LA KUJENGA TAIFA VIJANA WA MUJIBU WA SHERIA WANAOMALIZA 6 MEI 2014.

UTARATIBU WA KUJIUNGA NA JESHI LA KUJENGA TAIFA VIJANA WA MUJIBU WA SHERIA WANAOMALIZA 6 MEI 2014. AWAMU YA KWANZA; VIJANA 20,000 WATARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA JKT KUANZIA TAREHE 01 JUNI 2014 NA KUANZA RASMI MAFUNZO YAO TAREHE 08 JUNI 2014 NA KUMALIZA TAREHE 04 SEPTEMBA 2014. ORODHA YAO ITAANZA KUONEKANA KWENYE WEBSITE YA JKT TAREHE 11 MEI 2014 KUANZIA SAA NNE (4) ASUBUHI. AWAMU YA PILI; VIJANA 14450 WATARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA JKT KUANZIA TAREHE 11 SEPTEMBA 2014 NA KUANZA RASMI MAFUNZO TAREHE 18 SEPTEMBA 2014 NA KUMALIZA TAREHE 17 DESEMBA 2014. ORODHA YAO ITAANZA KUONEKANA KWENYE WEBSITE YA JKT TAREHE 11 MEI 2014 KUANZIA SAA KUMI (10) JIONI. KIJANA YEYOTE MWENYE ULEMAVU UNAOONEKANA ARIPOTI KATIKA KAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA RUVU JKT (832 KIKOSI CHA JESHI). VIJANA WOTE WANATAKIWA KUWA NA VYETI VYA KUMALIZA KIDATO CHA SITA ( LEAVING CERTIFICATE). INASISITIZWA VIJANA WARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI WALIOPANGIWA NA SIO KUJA MAKAO MAKUU YA JKT. IMETOLEWA NA MKUU WA JESHI LA KUJENGA TAIFA AWAMU YA KWANZA;VIJANA 20,000 WATARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA JKT KUANZIA TAREHE 01 JUNI 2014 NA KUANZA RASMI MAFUNZO YAO TAREHE 08 JUNI 2014 NA KUMALIZA TAREHE 04 SEPTEMBA 2014. ORODHA YAO ITAANZA KUONEKANA KWENYE WEBSITE YA JKT TAREHE 11 MEI 2014 KUANZIA SAA NNE (4) ASUBUHI. AWAMU YA PILI;VIJANA 14450 WATARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA JKT KUANZIA TAREHE 11 SEPTEMBA 2014 NA KUANZA RASMI MAFUNZO TAREHE 18 SEPTEMBA 2014 NA KUMALIZA TAREHE 17 DESEMBA 2014. ORODHA YAO ITAANZA KUONEKANA KWENYE WEBSITE YA JKT TAREHE 11 MEI 2014 KUANZIA SAA KUMI (10) JIONI. KIJANA YEYOTE MWENYE ULEMAVU UNAOONEKANA ARIPOTI KATIKA KAMBI YA MAFUNZO YA RUVU JKT (832 KIKOSI CHA JESHI). VIJANA WOTE WANATAKIWA KUWA NA VYETI VYA KUMALIZA KIDATO CHA SITA ( LEAVING CERTIFICATE). INASISITIZWA VIJANA WARIPOTI KWENYE MAKAMBI WALIOPANGIWA NA SIO KUJA MAKAO MAKUU YA JKT. IMETOLEWA NA MKUU WA JESHI LA KUJENGA TAIFA

Ongeza furaha yako kwa kujipenda.

Unayo kila sababu ya kufanya wiki yako kuwa ya kipekee kwa kupanga mambo yako kwenda vizuri kama utakavyo. Itapendeza kama kila siku ya wiki utafanya kazi zako katika mpangilio unaoeleweka na kukamilisha kazi zote kikamilifu kama ulivyokusudia. Siku za wiki huisha haraka sana, kama hutokuwa umejipanga vyema utajikuta wakati umepita ukiwa bado hujafanya lolote hivyo ni muhimu sana upange wiki yako vizuri na mapema kabla ya kuanza juma lingine upya. Wengi wetu tumezoea kupitisha siku kawaida tu kwa maana ya hatufanyi mabadiliko yoyote kati ya jana na leo. Itakuwa ni busara kama kila siku yako ikiwa ni tofauti na nyingine. Ni vyema ukafanya tathmini ya kazi zako zote ulizopanga kufanya wiki iliyopita na ujiulize je umeweza kukamilisha ipasavyo? Ikiwa utaona mambo hayakwenda vizuri ni vyema ukafanya mabadiliko. Mabadiliko yenyewe yataanza kwa kujiuliza kwanini mambo yako hayajakwenda sawa? Majibu utakayopata yatafakari kwa makini yakusaidie kukuongoza na kukurekebisha. Tabia nzuri zitakazokufanya ufanikishe hayo ni kama kuachana na uvivu na kuwa mtekelezaji wa kazi zako, jifunze kutumia muda wako vizuri, kuwa na mazoea ya kujifunza mambo mbalimbali yatakayokusaidia hapo baadae. Hizi hapa ni njia 6 za kupanga wiki yako leo zikusaidie kufanya yale yote upendayo 1. Andika chini kwenye karatasi chochote ambacho ni muhimu kwako Unapenda nini? Unaamini nini kinachokufanya ufurahie maisha yako na kukupa motisha ya kufanya kazi zako kwa moyo mmoja wa furaha. Ukijua nini unapenda na kufanyia kazi upendacho utaongeza utashi wako na hatimaye utafahamu maana halisi ya maisha yako. Kujitambua ndio mwanzo wa kujua vipawa vyako. 2. Jiwekee ratiba maalum kila jumapili kuwa ni siku ya kupanga yale yote unayotaka kufanya wiki ijayo Itategemea na kazi yako ilivyo, muhimu ni kuwa na mpangilio mzuri wa kazi zako kwa namna yeyote ile unavyoona inafaa. Kujipanga ni bora kuliko kutofanya lolote kabisa. Jiwekee mipango ya shughuli zako za wiki kwa kujua nini utafanya kuanzia siku ya jumatatu hadi jumamosi. Andika kwenye kitabu chako cha kazi chochote unachohitaji kukamilisha iwe ni shughuli ndogo au kubwa muhimu ni kujua je kazi yenyewe inatekelekeza? Kama jibu ni NDIYO weka kazi hiyo kwenye orodha ya kazi unazokusudia kukamilisha ndani muda fulani kulingana na ratiba yako ya wiki. 3. Jijengee mazoea ya kuangalia kalenda ya kazi zako, jua ni matukio gani yanafuata wiki ijayo ili ujiandae vizuri Angalia tarehe muhimu za matukio yajayo kama kuna mkutano wowote, una appointment na mtu au shughuli maalum inayokaribia kufanyika ili ujipange na kujiandaa mapema. Kumbuka ukiwa na mpango mzuri hakuna kitu kitakachoharibika kwakuwa utakuwa umejiandaa kwa lolote litakalojitokeza kuingilia mipango yako. 4. Panga kazi zako kwa mpangilio mzuri na rahisi kwako kuweza kutekeleza Usipange mambo mengi yafanyike ndani ya muda mfupi, utachanganya mambo na kushindwa kutekeleza yote. Jua kipi kianze na kipi kitafuata na utekeleze kila jambo kwa wakati wake. Do First Things First usirundike kazi nyingi katika siku moja. Fanya kila kazi kulingana na uzito wake na muda stahiki unaohitajika kufanya kazi hiyo. Jipe nafasi kwa kufanya kazi zako kwa ufanisi na muda wa kutosha. 5. Panga muda maalum wa kupumzika na wakufanya kazi zako. Hii itakusaidia kufanya kazi bila kujichosha na kuwa mwenye furaha kazini Fanya shughuli zako kwa bidii lakini usijifanyishe kazi kipita kiasi. Pima uzito wa kazi ujue utaifanya kwa muda gani na utilie uzito kiasi gani. Tumia nguvu na muda stahiki kufanya kazi husika kwa maana ya usitumie muda mwingi na nguvu nyingi kufanya kazi inayohitaji muda mfupi kukamilika. Hii imekaa vizuri kwa wale waliojiajiri lakini pia hata kama umeajiriwa jitahidi kufanya kazi kwa kadri unavyoweza bila kusahau kupumzika. 6. Kila mwisho wa siku fanya tathmini ya mafanikio ya malengo yako Huwezi jua umefanya nini cha maana ikiwa hujajiwekea malengo. Ukiwa na malengo ni rahisi kujua umepiga hatua kimaendeleo kwa kiasi gani. Ni muhimu kuweka kumbukumbu ya kila mafanikio unayopata ili kujua wapi umefanya vizuri na wapi kazi imedorora.

Njia 7 za kudhibiti hasira.

Kila mtu hukasirika pale anapochukizwa au kukasirishwa na jambo fulani, hali hii humtokea mtu yeyote. Ikiwa utaruhusu hasira zikutawale zitakupelekea kuvuruga akili yako na hatimaye kudhoofisha afya yako. Hasira sio kitu kizuri kabisa, hasira inaweza kuwa ni ya kubomoa au kujenga lakini mara nyingi hasira husababisha hasara kwa kuwa inabomoa na kuharibu mambo. Tuangalie hii mifano miwili; *.Unaingia nyumbani na kukuta sebuleni kumekaa hovyo makochi, meza na vitu vingine vimekaa shagara bagara. Unakasirika na kuona vitu vimekaa vibaya na kuamua kupanga na kuweka kila kitu sawa. Baada ya muda sebule inaonekana ni yenye kupendeza tena. *.Mzazi wako anaongea na wewe na kukuomba umueleze kwanini umechelewa kurudi nyumbani. Unakasirika na kuamua kumfokea hadi kutaka kupigana. Baada ya muda mzazi wako anachukizwa kwa kile ulichofanya na wote mnakuwa katika hali mbaya ya kutoelewana.Katika mifano hiyo miwili hapo juu tunaona ni jinsi gani hasira inaweza kukujenga na kukufanya ufanye jambo kwa ari na kwa nguvu zako zote vilevile hasira inaweza kuharibu mambo na kukupelekea uwe katika hali ya majuto. Hizi hapa ni njia 7 za kukusaidia kutuliza hasira zako 1. Fikiri kabla hujaongea Unapojihisi unashindwa kujitawala na kupandisha hasira. Ni vyema ukakaa kimya au kuondoka kabisa mahali ulipo ili kuepusha shari au kuongea mambo ambayo yatakufanya ujute hapo baadae. Utakaponyamaza ni rahisi hata kwa mtu/watu unaongea nao kutulia kwakuwa hutoonyesha dalili ya kutaka kujibizana. Ikiwa mtu atakulazimisha kwa namna moja au nyingine uongee basi ni vyema ukamwambia sipo tayari kuongea na wewe kwa sasa labda baadae na ondoka katika eneo hilo bila kusema neno lingine lolote. 2. Vuta pumzi Unapopandisha hasira, mapigo yako ya moyo yanaongezeka kwa kasi, nguvu nazo zinaongezeka na mwili wako unakuwa tayari kufanya lolote pasipo kufikiri na kushindwa kujitawala. Kufikia hatua hiyo ni hali mbaya sana inayoweza kukupelekea kufanya jambo lolote la hatari. Hali hiyo inapaswa kudhibitiwa na wewe mwenyewe kabla hujakuwa na hasira zaidi. Itakubidi ushushe hasira zako kwa kukaa chini na kutulia kisha vuta pumzi, jitahidi kuhimili mihemko yako ya mwili kwa kutofanya lolote bali kutulia na kuvuta pumzi na kupumua angalau kwa dakika 5. Vuta pumzi ndani taratibu na kwa wingi kisha pumua. Baada ya dakika 2-3 bila shaka utaanza kujisikia mwenye amani. 3. Nenda mahali penye amani au popote penye kuleta furaha Ukiwa na hasira iliyokutawala kwa muda mrefu ni vyema ukaenda mahali ambapo unaweza kupata furaha mfano kwenye fukwe za bahari au ziwa (beach), bustani nzuri yenye majani na maua ya kupendeza au mahali ambapo kuna mkusanyiko wa watu wengi na shughuli za kijamii zinafanyika kama kwenye stadium (uwanja wa mpira wa miguu, kikapu, nyavu n.k) na pengine popote pale ambapo unaweza ukaondoa mawazo mabaya na kujifariji. 4. Hesabu namba kichwani 1 mpaka 20 Unaweza kuona mbinu hii ya kuhesabu namba kama haina maana lakini ikiwa utaitumia itakusaidia kuondoa mawazo ya kitu au mtu aliyekukasirisha na kuweza kujimudu kupambana na hasira zako. Vuta pumzi na kisha pumua taratibu, anza kuhesabu namba kuanzia 1 kupanda mpaka 20 bila kufikiri chochote isipokuwa weka mawazo yako katika kuhesabu namba. Usiruhusu mtu akukatishe hivyo itabidi ukae mahali peke yako au ikiwezekana tulia na hesabu namba zako bila kusikiliza chochote. 5. Eleza shida yako au kitu kinachokukera kwa mtu wako wa karibu unayemuamini Kueleza mambo yanayokusibu kwa mtu mwingine ni njia nzuri ya kutoa kero zako zinazokufanya ukasirike. Mtu wako wa karibu anaweza kuwa mzazi, shangazi, kaka au jamaa yako. Ikiwa utaeleza kero zako kwa mtu wako wa karibu utatoa yaliyo moyoni mwako na kuwa mwenye amani. Pia utakapomueleza mtu yanayokusibu ni rahisi kupata ushauri mzuri kutoka kwake ambao huenda utakusaidia kutatua tatizo lako. 6. Epuka kuwa karibu na mtu au kitu kinachokuchukiza Unaweza kuwa unakasirika kila umuonapo mtu fulani usiyempenda, pia unaweza kuwa unakasirika kila uonapo kitu fulani usichokipenda. Chochote kinachokufanya ukasirike ni vyema ukakiepuka ili usichukie. Kama ni mtu fulani ndiye anakusababisha ukasirike ni vyema ukatafuta ufumbuzi wa mgogoro wenu na kuweka mambo sawa. 7. Fanya zoezi lolote la kuchangamsha mwili Jishughulishe na mchezo wowote au mazoezi kama kuogelea, kuendesha baiskeli, kukimbia angalau kilomita 2 au tembea kwa miguu kwa umbali fulani. Lengo ni kubadilisha mazingira, kufikiri na kuona mengine kuliko kukaa sehemu moja na kufikiri mambo hayo hayo yanayokusabibisha upate hasira.

Mbinu 12 za kukufanya ushinde na kukubalika kila wakati katika maongezi.

1. Unapoongea na mtu, jitahidi sana msijibizane Inapotokea katika mazungumzo yenu hamjaelewana epuka kurushiana maneno ya hasira. Unachotakiwa kufanya ni kusitisha mazungumzo kwa kumwambia mtaongea wakati mwingine, kwa kufanya hivyo utaepusha ugomvi au jambo lingine baya ambalo lingeweza kutokea. 2. Heshimu mazunguzo yenu, usiwe mkosoaji sana au kujaji kila kitu mwenzako anachosema Kila mtu ana mapungufu yake, lakini wachache sana hupenda kukosolewa nikiwa na maana wengi wetu hatupendi kupingwa kwa yale tunayosema. Tafuta namna nyingine ya kumrekebisha mtu kiuungwana kama anachokisema sio sahihi au ni uongo. 3. Kuwa msikilazaji mzuri kuliko muongeaji sana Namna nzuri ya kuelewa vizuri kile mtu anachosema ni kwa kumsikiliza kwa makini anachokwambia. Anapozungumza mtu unachotakiwa kufanya ni kusikiliza anachokisema na sio kutafakari sana nini cha kumjibu. Muangalie mtu usoni anapoongea na wewe na tikisa kichwa kama unakubaliana nae kuhusu hicho anachokwambia, kwa kumuangalia na kutikisa kichwa kama ishara ya kuonyesha unamuelewa anachokisema humfanya muongeaji ajue kwamba upo nae. 4. Usijaribu kutawala mazungumzo Kama unazungumza na mtu au kundi la watu, jitahidi sana kuwapa nafasi na wengine nao wachangie mawazo yao. Kuongea sana peke yako pasipo kumpa nafasi mtu mwingine naye aongee kutakufanya uonekane mbinafsi na ni mtu mwenye kutaka yako tu yasikilizwe. 5. Changia chochote ulichonacho, mazungumzo huchangamka pale wote mnapoongea na kusikilizana. Sio lazima unapochangia kitu uwe sahihi sana, bali jitahidi kuongelea chochote kinachohusiana na mada mnayozungumzia. Kinachotakiwa katika mazungumzo ni kuonyesha na wewe upo kwa kusema jambo lolote zuri. 6. Jitahidi kulengesha macho yako kwa mtu unayeongea nae Ukimwangalia mtu machoni anapoongea atakuona kwamba unafuatilia anachoongea hivyo utampa moyo wa kuendelea kuzungumza lakini usimkazie macho maana utamfanya asijiamini na kujiona labda anakosea anachokiongea. 7. Tabasamu na onyesha uso wa bashasha kwa mtu/watu unaongea nao Kila mtu hupenda kumwona mwenzake anayeongea ni mwenye furaha. Hata kama una matatizo yako mengine unapokutana na mtu jitahidi kutoonyesha matatizo yako kwake labda kama huyo mtu ni muhimu sana ajue kinachokusibu. 8. Unapozungumza tulia na ongea kwa kujiamini, hii itadhihirisha ni jinsi gani unajua vizuri unachokizungumzia Moja ya sifa ya mwongeaji mzuri ni uwezo wake wa kuongea kwa uhakika na kujiamini kwa kile anachokiwasilisha kwa msikilizaji. Jipange vyema kila unapotaka kuwasilisha jambo kwa watu watakaokusikiliza kuepuka kutoeleweka vizuri kwa wasikilizaji. 9. Kama mtu unayeongea naye ni mgeni kwako, muulize maswali ya kawaida tu pasipo kutaka kujua undani wake Utamshagaza mtu pale utakapomuuliza maswali mengi kwa muda mfupi, watu huchukua muda kuzoeana hivyo ni vyema ukajenga uhusiano imara kwanza kabla ya kutaka kujua mengi kuhusu yeye. Unaweza kuuliza maswali ya kawaida. Mfano:-Unapenda kufanya nini ukiwa nyumbani? -Una familia ya watoto wangapi? 10. Jitahidi kujidhibiti usipayuke au kuzungumza kwa sauti ya chini Ongea kwa sauti ambayo msikilizaji anaweza kukusikia, kama unasisitiza kitu basi ongeza sauti kiasi kwa namna ya kuonyesha msisitizo. 11. Jitahidi kuwa mkweli na ujue nini unaongea kwa mtu anayekusikiliza kwani hakuna mtu unayependa kusikiliza uongo Hata kama ni wewe hutopenda kusikiliza umbea usio wa maana, ni hivyo pia kwa mtu mwingine. Kumbuka kwa kadri mtu anavyokusikia kila siku unazungumza uongo ndivyo anavyopungukiwa imani na wewe. Uaminifu ni kitu cha gharama sana. Chunga usipoteze uaminifu wako kwasababu ya vitu vidogo vidogo kama kusema uongo. 12. Jitahidi kujua mambo mengi kwa kusoma magazeti, kusikiliza redio au kuangalia televisheni kiasi fulani ili upate uwanja mpana wa kuongelea chochote mnachozungumza. Utashangaza watu ikiwa utakosa chochote cha kuongea iwapo utapewa nafasi ya kusema kitu, jifunze mambo mengi kwa kusoma, kusikiliza na kuangalia vyombo vya habari ujue nini wenzako wanafanya ulimwenguni. Sio lazima uwe muongeaji mzuri sana bali ni vyema uwe mtu mwenye mawazo mapana na mambo mazuri ya kuongea na watu kila unapopata nafasi ya kuongea.